4 Questions to Ask to Yourself to Create Powerful Goals

“If people are good only because they fear punishment, or hope for reward, then we are a sorry lot indeed.”
                                                                                                                – Albert Einstein

There’s a story that’s been told time and time again about John Lennon as a young schoolboy. One day, his teacher assigned the class a simple task: "What do you want to be when you grow up?"

As the answers came in, they were exactly what you'd expect from a group of young children: policeman, nurse, teacher, fireman, and so on. Practical aspirations. Safe. Expected.

Then it was John’s turn.

The teacher asked, “John, what do you want to be when you grow up?”

Without missing a beat, young Lennon replied with one word: “Happy.”

Legend has it that his teacher wasn’t amused. She threatened to punish him unless he answered with something more conventional. But John stood firm, offering no other answer than the one that was true to his heart. Perhaps this was the very moment that John Lennon, the rebel who would challenge the status quo, was born.

In that simple, profound response, John Lennon touched on something universal. Deep down, isn’t that what we all want? Happiness, fulfillment, inner peace? The truth is that while most of us focus on the “what” — career, success, and status — the real answer lies in the “how” — in the inner world of what we truly seek to experience.

In their book From Me to We, brothers Marc and Craig Kielburger share an insightful distinction that connects to Lennon’s wisdom: the difference between Extrinsic and Intrinsic Goals.

• Extrinsic Goals are the ones we chase outside ourselves: career accomplishments, financial success, possessions, and status.
• Intrinsic Goals, however, come from within: love, peace, personal growth, service to others, and connection with a higher purpose.

Neither is inherently good nor bad, but here’s the key insight the Kielburgers offer: when we become clear about our Intrinsic Goals, the Extrinsic Goals tend to unfold in ways that exceed our expectations.

This has led me to reflect deeply on my own journey, especially as I consider the goals I’ve set for myself in 2025 and beyond.

In a world that often prizes material success, I find myself wondering: Can we achieve true success by starting with what’s happening inside? Can we create the external life we desire by first cultivating the internal world we want to experience?

If you find yourself pondering similar questions, I encourage you to ask yourself these four essential questions to gain clarity on your Intrinsic Goals — those goals that shape your internal world and ultimately influence the external world around you.

1) What do I want to feel?

When you pause and really think about it, every goal we set — whether it’s related to our career, relationships, health, or finances — is ultimately rooted in a desire to feel a certain way. We work for that promotion, not because of the title itself, but because we believe it will bring us feelings of recognition, confidence, or security.

But what if we got clear on the feelings we desire before we chase the accomplishments? What if we focused on cultivating feelings of love, confidence, peace, joy, and yes, happiness from within — not because of the results we hope to achieve, but as a means of attracting those results to us? When we align with the feelings we seek, we set ourselves up for a more fulfilling journey and, often, greater success.

2) Who do I want to be?

As Drs. Ron and Mary Hulnick, my cherished teachers, often say, “Outer experience is an expression of inner reality.”

What they mean is that the way we show up in the world — our outer reality — is a direct reflection of our inner state. We may not always be able to control what’s happening around us, but we can always control how we respond.

So, who do you want to be in the world? Loving? Courageous? Confident? Trusting? Joyful? The beauty of this is that we get to choose. It’s not about waiting for life to change — it’s about becoming the change we wish to see. When we intentionally embody the qualities we desire, we magnetize those very experiences into our lives.

3) How do I want to serve?

In my own experience, there’s nothing more powerful than the act of service. It’s in serving others, sharing our unique gifts, and helping others discover their own potential that we truly find purpose and fulfillment. When we focus on lifting others up, we elevate ourselves in the process.

Imagine a world where everyone was clear about their gifts and used them to serve others. A world where the act of giving became the norm, rather than the exception. I believe many of our societal challenges would dissolve, not because of grand changes, but because people would feel so deeply fulfilled by sharing their unique talents, they’d naturally want to help others do the same.

So, how do you want to serve? What gifts can you share with the world?

4) Why is it important to me?

To truly move forward in our lives, getting clear on our “why” is essential. It’s the fuel that powers the engine of our dreams. When you know why something matters to you — deeply, soulfully — the how often falls into place.

As author Brian Klemmer wisely puts it, “If how-to’s were enough, we would all be skinny, rich, and happy.” The secret to success lies not just in having a strategy, but in connecting with a deeper purpose. When we understand our “why,” we unlock a surge of energy, clarity, and motivation that propels us forward, even when challenges arise.

These four questions — what do I want to feel, who do I want to be, how do I want to serve, and why is it important — are not just for reflection; they are calls to action. When you get clear on your Intrinsic Goals, you open yourself to a life that aligns with your deepest values. And, as John Lennon so wisely knew, when you focus on being happy first, everything else falls into place.

So, if you find yourself uncertain of how things will unfold, remember: If you stay true to your inner clarity, and pursue happiness as your first goal, the outer achievements will be far more meaningful, and far more abundant, than you could have ever imagined.

And if the world never fully recognizes your outer goals, remember this — you will have already achieved what matters most.

Just ask John Lennon.

With love and purpose,
 

Chris Natzke
Black Belt Leadership Speaking & Coaching

PS: If you'd like to learn more about how I inspire leaders and their teams through my speaking programs...... CLICK HERE to check out my new speaker highlight reel.  Contact me at www.ChrisNatzke.com to learn more.