"(A) process orientation (versus outcome orientation)… asks ‘How do I do it?’ instead of ‘Can I do it?’ and this directs attention toward defining the steps that are necessary on the way. This orientation can be characterized in terms of the guiding principle that there are no failures, only ineffective solutions."

                                                                                                                                          – Ellen Langer, Mindfulness

How often do we find ourselves paralyzed by the question: "Can I do it?"

It’s a question that’s natural to ask when faced with a challenge, but it’s also one that can stop us in our tracks. The moment we focus on whether we can achieve something, we tend to get caught in a cycle of fear, doubt, and uncertainty. We worry about failure, which, ironically, makes failure more likely.

But what if I told you the question you should be asking is not “Can I do it?” but rather "How do I do it?"

Let me ex...

“(A) process orientation (versus outcome orientation) . . . asks ‘How do I do it?’ instead of ‘Can I do it?’ and this directs attention toward defining the steps that are necessary on the way. This orientation can be characterized in terms of the guiding principle that there are no failures, only ineffective solutions.”

                                                                                       - Ellen Langer, Mindfulness

Think of the last time you faced a major challenge in your life.  You may be at that place right now as you read this. 

How many times are we caught up in the mind game of whether we can successfully tackle a challenging situation?  Our minds can go in all types of crazy directions that cause us to delay our actions, bring us upset and ultimately cause us to miss opportunities because we doubt our ability to succeed. 

This is most often rooted in us just focusing on the outcome of the situation and not the process we can move through to transce...

“(A) process orientation (versus outcome orientation) . . . asks ‘How do I do it?’ instead of ‘Can I do it?’ and this directs attention toward defining the steps that are necessary on the way. This orientation can be characterized in terms of the guiding principle that there are no failures, only ineffective solutions.”

                                                                                   - Ellen Langer, Mindfulness

Think of the last time you faced a major challenge in your life. 

You may be at that place right now as you read this. 

How many times are we caught up in the mind game of whether we can successfully tackle a challenging situation? 

Our minds can go in all types of crazy directions that cause us to delay our actions, bring us upset and ultimately cause us to miss opportunities because we doubt our ability to succeed. 

This is most often rooted in us just focusing on the outcome of the situation and not the process we can move through to tra...

“(A) process orientation (versus outcome orientation) . . . asks ‘How do I do it?’ instead of ‘Can I do it?’ and this directs attention toward defining the steps that are necessary on the way. This orientation can be characterized in terms of the guiding principle that there are no failures, only ineffective solutions.”

                                                                                       - Ellen Langer, Mindfulness

Think of the last time you faced a major challenge in your life.  You may be at that place right now as you read this. 

How many times are we caught up in the mind game of whether we can successfully tackle a challenging situation?  Our minds can go in all types of crazy directions that cause us to delay our actions, bring us upset and ultimately cause us to miss opportunities because we doubt our ability to succeed. 

This is most often rooted in us just focusing on the outcome of the situation and not the process we can move through to transce...

“People who want what’s best for you, want to see you at your best.”

                                                                                          - Oprah Winfrey

I was recently watching an inspirational video on YouTube featuring Oprah Winfrey delivering a commencement speech to an auditorium of graduating college students (yes, I think Oprah is the bomb 😊). 

During her impassioned address, she imparted upon the graduates the words shared above,

“People who want what’s best for you, want to see you at your best.” 

Hearing these words caused me to pause, reflect upon and appreciate all of the amazing people I have had in my life who supported and encouraged me. 

These include my parents, my family, my martial arts instructors, my students, my bosses, my coaches, my friends, and yes, my former spouse. 

Each one of them has brought a specific gift to me to encourage me to be my best by claiming the best that they see in me. 

During almost every ke...

“(A) process orientation (versus outcome orientation) . . . asks ‘How do I do it?’ instead of ‘Can I do it?’ and this directs attention toward defining the steps that are necessary on the way. This orientation can be characterized in terms of the guiding principle that there are no failures, only ineffective solutions.”

                                                                                       - Ellen Langer, Mindfulness

Think of the last time you faced a major challenge in your life.  You may be at that place right now as you read this. 

How many times are we caught up in the mind game of whether we can successfully tackle a challenging situation?  Our minds can go in all types of crazy directions that cause us to delay our actions, bring us upset and ultimately cause us to miss opportunities because we doubt our ability to succeed. 

This is most often rooted in us just focusing on the outcome of the situation and not the process we can move through to transce...

"Quality questions create a quality life.  Successful people ask better questions, and as a result, they get better answers.”

                                                                                                       - Anthony Robbins

Questions.  I have heard innumerable times in my life that the quality of our lives is in direct proportion to the quality of questions we ask ourselves.  This is particularly true when are dealing with challenges.  

As leaders in our lives and in our organizations, challenges are indeed a constant.  Ask any leader who embarked upon something big, and they will almost always tell you that they never arrived at their desired outcome in the way they had planned.  Challenges which required their flexibility, perseverance and creativity to course correct, were the one constant in their journey.  They will also most likely tell you that their ability to move through these challenges were best served by asking themselves and their teams empowerin...